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Sunday, January 2, 2011
There is a term that is making the rounds that seems to be a current excuse for someone not always wanting to use a little tact. I keep hearing the words, "just sayin'" that follow an observation that can be somewhat bluntly stated or perhaps could be a touch harsh to someone.
The Urban Dictionary defines it by "a term coined to be used at the end of something insulting or offensive to take the heat off you when you say it."
I'm not sure that it's always meant to be offensive, but usually it's meant to tell someone what you're really thinking. Here in the South, another one is often used, "Bless (his or her) heart". Which is usually either preceded or followed by something said about someone that is insulting or mean spirited. It is usually said behind the person's back, which is less hurtful to the person who is the target, because they can't hear it, but perhaps is less "straight forward" than the other one.
I'm all for telling honest truths to someone you care about, but perhaps in a more diplomatic way. And I don't want you to think that I don't make mistakes, (some HUGE), and others a little smaller. But I did want to mention what I've noticed. It bothers me to see people's feelings hurt unnecessarily.
So from someone who is not perfect in any way, I'm just asking you to join me in taking another second or two before speaking if this current urge hits. It might make a big difference and it's so hard to take away words, once they are uttered.